Long List of Confusion

So I know I haven't posted in week. Between a new job, and a couple of new responsibilities, and some big events; my blogging has gone by the wayside. However today's post is about that moment when you really don't know which way is the right way. When none of your decisions seem to make sense and your heart and head refuse to agree. 

There are a couple of parts of my life that I tend to keep private. That I want to keep to myself due to either embarrassment, low confidence, or udder confusion. 

Recently I have no idea what I want to do. Should do. Should I go for my Mechanical Engineering degree first or should I go to my Auto Mechanic' certification? I have no idea where I should direct my life, and I'm terrified of failure. I'd be permanently horrified if I ever woke up one morning and my life still wasn't on track. 

I feel like I have a need to appease everyone around me, as if I need their approval. I want to get over that more than anyone can imagine. To be able to do the things I want without looking back. That was my goal when this year started. I have yet to get there but I will. I have to. 

I'm going to start little by little. I'm going to start inward and work my way out. 

I recently downloaded the Nike+ Running app. You can find it at Google Play  here and Itunes app store here. Add me at MuvementA on the app. I would love to run with you guys. 

Till next time (^_^)

Independence and being alone

So I currently live in my mothers basement. Yes let it sink in. I live a young adults nightmare. I'm lucky enough that rent isn't an issue and there's slightly more privacy but I do still have to deal with my mother and sisters on a daily basis. 

I'm the first of three girls. Life was and still is a constant bicker. Me and the middle child of my household have a hate/hate relationship. I honestly have grown to seriously dislike my sister. I don't hate her and would never let someone hurt her, but I can't possibly see us being friends. Two days ago things got bad and we ended up having a physical fight. 

A lot came out into the open and I realize between my prejudices of her and her violent and controlling nature we just can't be close. I truly believe my sister feels the need to always be in control, and I've been told she in constant competition with me. I don't even know what her goal is. I just know its not mine. She's more stress than I ever want to deal with in my current and future life. Telle est la vie et vous mourrez! 

My goal is TO BE HAPPY. I want to make my decisions and not regret or think back on a thing. I want to embody the YOLO (You Only Live Once) life style according to what I want. I've had a very bad habit of living for my family and their wishes (I am of Haitian descent). I'm over it. I'm done being stifled. 

So starting today I'm tearing away from what I've always known. I'm worried anxious, and incredibly excited. Wish me Luck!! 

Till next time ! ^_^

Hey world!!

Hey World!!

Hello all. My friends call me Irv, and this is my blog! :D

Now I've tried this before a couple years ago, and I honestly felt like I had nothing to write about so I kinda gave up on the whole notion. But at this point in my life I'm going through a lot and I feel the biggest shift in my life coming on. I want to share, experience and learn with someone else ... So why not do it with people I don't know?? loll

This would be where I tell you about myself right?? Ok so here we go .....

I'm a 24 years old female.

I live in the best city in the world!! New York City!! (Queens for all my natives)

My interests you ask?

Computers/Cars

Video Games

Fashion

My Dog

Fitness

DIY/Home Decor

 I know. I'm completely all over the place. I've been told I'm too ambitious for my own good -__- ...

I'm going to post as much as I can. I'm even looking for a really good camera so I can visually show all the things I like to speak about. 

Deciding to blog was hard for me because I'm such an introvert, but I also believe opening up is going to be the biggest step I'll have to overcome and I want to be proactive about doing it on my own terms. 

Till next time!! ^__^